Joint Duty Log | LtCmdr Tristan Neyes PhD, Lt Saia Roswell - "The Murmur of the Heartbeat"

Posted on Tue Aug 26th, 2014 @ 12:34am by Commander Tristan Neyes PhD. & Lieutenant JG Saia Roswell

1,883 words; about a 9 minute read

Mission: In the Dark
Location: Counselling Suite
Timeline: While Docked

=/\= Deck 3, Counselling Suite =/\=

Tristan was sat in his temporary office, while he commissioned the renovation of the much more apt space his counselling would require on the Vindicator. The medical department took nearly all livable space on Deck 3. The Hospital itself was about half of it, and his dept was allowed about a third of the office area. Requisitioning a change in floor layout had been surprisingly easy though, considering the work it would entail. Nearly half of it had been completed already, a feat that Landon would have appreciated, and thus had left him impressed with engineering. This ship's engineering crew was determined and quite skilled. Engineering had also fallen as the least needing of his attention, according to the schedule that had been drawn up for him. He'd yet to meet with the Chief Engineer, although a few of Landon's memories of the man kept swimming to the surface of his thoughts now and again. Almar was able, efficient, kept others at arm's length, at least as far as his new memories reminded him.

He'd been hesitant to unpack, since he didn't want the crew to grow used to the temporary office. Moving his patients around was bad enough, and only added to his disappointment in the lack of the ship's psychiatric facilities. This crew needed his help, and he had a few ideas about how to do that.

When his door chime rang, he knew it would be the Chief Science Officer, Lieutenant Roswell. He'd asked her to come for a visit, but had been a little nondescript as to what for. Of course... as counselor he was allowed that luxury every once and a while. "Enter, please."

Saia had grumped the whole way there. It was a mandatory meeting. She had promised one meeting. That was all. That would get her family off her back for awhile. She sighed and put on the indifferent air of an officer as she entered, "You asked for me?"

Tristan nodded as the young Trill woman entered. "Dai xulan, Ms. Roswell." He smiled after the Trill greeting, motioning casually for her to take a seat at the other side of the room. A few comfortable lounge chairs sat in a semi-circle a few meters from his desk, around a glass table with a single orange rose and some baby's breath. It was reminiscent of a well-fashioned private living room, only inside a counselor's office.

"Can I get you something to drink? I have an odd craving for a Raktajino this afternoon." He moved to the replicator.

She shook her head, "No thank you... Why did you ask me in?" She tried not to sound impatient, but failed. She did sit, however. Though she fidgeted.

He replicated her a glass of water anyway.

With Roswell's hurried impatience, Tristan's eyes looked her over once as she sat. Her eyes looked everywhere except his, and scanned the room. He could see her trying to stay busy, to keep from engaging in the conversation she was afraid to have. Maybe, at least that was what he could glean from her disposition and behavior. Neyes moved to the large lounge chair opposite from where she sat, only the small table and a little rose between them, and he set the glass in front of her.

"I took the opportunity to read your file, Lieutenant." He sipped again, "I thought we might go over a few things. But first I'd like to ask you how the last mission went for you. Aside from the obvious, how are you doing since being back on the ship?"

She shrugged, "Glad to be warm and work with sensors that work." She gave a pinched smile, failing to look loose and relaxed as she'd hoped she would.

"I can imagine." Tristan said seriously, glossing over her obvious attempts to look comfortable. "Your department is rather large for a single ship. How are they fairing? Notice anything worth mentioning?"

Having come to a topic not nearly as personal, her smile became genuine and her posture became stiff, but out of sitting up straight in pride, "We are an exploratory ship, so I believe its size is rather reasonable. I'd like to think nothing can slip under our noses since we keep such a good look on the data. Sometimes the command team even lets us go grab some of it to study. We have a fantastic archive and lab." She didn't mean to avoid the question, but she felt her team was rather fabulous and she loved how well they worked together and brainstormed. The simple matter was that that really was her answer. Her team was her team and they did what they needed to and even beyond, with a deep nerdy passion.

Tristan waited a moment, then purposefully set his glass down on the table between them. It clinked against the similar glass of the tabletop. He leaned back in his chair, not breaking eye contact with the young woman, and took a breath. She was careful not to mention anything about herself, he noted, and even then she was uncomfortable. It didn't seem as though it would have mattered if she was speaking to a counselor or not, though. There were no indicators she was concerned with him specifically.

"I am a no-nonsense kind of man, Lieutenant. Especially when it comes to my work. From your personnel and duty file it looks like you have an impressive array of works, so you must understand what it means to take that seriously." The question was rhetorical, but he waited for her to respond anyway.

She felt his eyes on her and she squirmed a bit looking away. She bit at her lip, something she was sure he would recognize from Landon's memories. She stopped and pursed her lips instead. She couldn't bring herself to look in his eyes, "Of course I do. Then, tell me why you asked me here." After a moment, having a respectful tone, but forgot to include, "Sir."

"I want to hear what you have to say, Saia. I asked you a question about your staff, which you still haven't answered. If I were to ask you about your experience on the surface, would you answer that question for me?"

Saia tilted her head, "My staff is fine. They are as eager as usual. I have one officer who seems to need more holodeck training to condition him before he is sent back out, but other than that, none seem worse for wear. I was lost and then they found me. I was worried about my fellow officers and our guide. They all seem fine now. I am frustrated that we can't use the resources on that planet. I was scared and cold. But I'm back now. Not scared and not cold." She looked into his eyes, being quite truthful about her experience on the surface. She soon looked down swearing she saw a glint of Landon in those eyes. Which she knew wasn't physical since Neyes had a brand new host and Tristan's eyes were nothing like Landon's, but that human saying of eyes are the window's to the soul... Well, Neyes was too familiar to look into. Also fearing that Neyes and Tristan would see that she was leaving something out. Something she honestly forgot about before realizing someone could see what she had blocked out for a time.

Tristan noted something internally, then spoke again, "I often find a distinction between worry and fear. If you were worried about the others, what were you afraid of?"

Saia laughed and rolled her eyes and her tone held a 'isn't it obvious' tone, "Freezing to death."

"You're trained for extreme climate away missions." Neyes added thoughtfully, "Was that really what you were scared of? You weren't afraid of anything else?" He locked eyes with her, a cool expression of want silently asking her to reveal more. To let herself and her barriers go. It was a lot to ask of someone, so he did his best to let his demeanor do all the asking.

She shrugged, "True, but one would die in extreme climates after awhile. I wasn't sure how long I would be out there." She looked away and added, "That was all I was afraid of." She looked up, "You asked me about my time on the planet. I answered. And maybe some hallucinations." She added the last bit as if adding apples to a shopping list, "But I think that happens when one is in a blizzard. The wind howls in your ear, the snow swirls..." She figured she could give him that much. Darn Trill Symbionts and their intuitions. She knew better. Maybe with this it would satisfy whatever Neyes was getting a hunch about.

A tough nut to crack, as the expression went. In his profession it was a little inappropriate, and certainly did not apply in the derogatory sense. No one was a 'nut' to Tristan, just someone who didn't know they wanted an ear to hear them once and a while. For Saia, Neyes was going to have to ease her into a more official session. There were too many apt, but ill-received metaphors for therapeutic endeavors.

"Fair enough. I won't take any more of your time, Lieutenant. I'd like to sit down with you again in a month or so, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Just wanted a quick chat today. Do you have any questions you'd like to ask me before I set you free?" He asked jokingly.

She looked at him, "Do any of Landon's memories give you cause to be concerned about me?" She didn't spend much time with Landon, but she did wonder about any rumors he may have heard, if she behaved on the bridge any differently, or anything.

"My ability to use what I remember from Landon's memories is... a complicated subject, in terms of me being your counselor on board this ship. Especially since he was your commanding officer. There are some things which I cannot and would not consider to be part of my relationship with a patient. I would be lying if I told you Landon did not keep an eye out for you, however. Nothing out of the ordinary.

"Is there something specific you're thinking of? I might be able to help you if I had more information." Tristan probed.

Saia looked down and shook her head, "It's just nice knowing he's still around in some way." She smiled, "Thank you, sir."

The words, even though she meant them in the kindest way she possibly could, still felt like a shallow cut across the surface. Landon was part of him now. Would they ever be able to accept that the person he'd become wasn't actually Landon? Would they always see him as a new iteration of their former Captain? If so, Tristan would need to find a way to distance himself from that persona, or at least stand out above it.

He lit up with a friendly grin, "No, Ms. Roswell. Thank you for talking with me. I look forward to doing it again sometime."

=/\= END LOG =/\=

Lt. Commander Tristan Neyes
Chief Counselor
USS VINDICATOR

Lt. JG Saia Roswell
Chief Science Officer
USS VINDICATOR

 

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