Joint Personal Log | Capt Ivanova, Cmdr Dahe'el - "Cards On The Table, We're Both Showing Hearts"

Posted on Thu Aug 28th, 2014 @ 12:51am by Admiral Rochelle Ivanova

2,853 words; about a 14 minute read

Mission: In the Dark

It burned.

Standing there in the mirror, a still shower soaked Rochelle examined the blood shot and bruise darkened skin around her eye, gingerly touching it with her fingertips as she did. It had been her own fault, resisting what naturally came next in the procession of the Atlantean culture, attempting to deny them a new Queen. She sighed, a heavy sound, rolling as it passed over her lips and accompanied a shake of her head. Only a true gobemouche would have thought she could escape them – the laws of divorce that were accepted by Starfleet, not by the Atlanteayns and none of it mattered now.

She was Queen.

The tiara could be hidden away in a drawer, but the bruise would remain until she could get her hands on a medical tri-corder without raising suspicion. A Captain with a black eye was a cause for alarm, especially given the circumstances the ship had been through. Vlimar had done his best to dispose of the fouter that had delivered both the crown and the blow – but he’d stick like a tick, bound to make her into the Queen that the Atlanteans demanded that she should be. He'd declared asylum - something she couldn't deny him and a proper JAG hearing would take forever.

She reached to her vanity, touching the combadge that sat there in wait of placement. “Ivanova to Dahe’el.” She said, her voice weary, “I need to speak with you for a moment in private council.” How proper and quaint. She knew he’d find her, however vague her instructions had been. After all, he’d admonished as much as if his duty to her had been designed by way of kismet’s fortunes. As if the Gods had predetermined his legacy by the siege of engrenage.

But what of her XO? The one who had co-witnessed the horrible event? At that moment, Rochelle needed a different face, someone other than the willowy demi-sang woman. She swallowed the irritation that had formed a knot in her throat, and reached for her robe, quickly slipping it over her still damp body.

Almar reached up and tapped his comm badge as soon as her voice had faded, a smile crossing his face as it settled into his mind and refreshed his overworked mind, "On my way Captain."

Standing from his desk in Engineering, the Cardassian found himself drifting effortlessly along the corridor towards the turbolift, since the events following the awards ceremony he'd seen a larger number of people whispering in his presence, hushed words that he could barely hear, what he did catch were rumours of him and Rochelle.

The turbolift sped him towards her quarters, it would have been an obvious location for them to meet, she'd recently moved up into the Commanding Officer's stateroom, a much larger and more lavish set of rooms, but still as private as any other assignment on the ship. Striding towards her door, he found himself shifting slightly and pulling his jacket down, tightening out some wrinkles that had formed in his short journey, his hand instinctively found the chime as he came to a halt.

"Come." Rochelle called, knowing full well who it was standing on the other side of that door and knew, for the most part, what would transpire the moment he stepped through them. She instinctively tightened the terry cloth robe around her waist as she heard the doors hiss open.

Rumors and conjecture had often circulated around the Vindicator. First about her and Landon and now about her and the Cardassian. There would always be something, some whisper in the shadows about the love lives of the command team members, and what could possibly be more delectable than the idea of a Starfleet Captain, a human woman, consorting with a Cardassian. Irresistible. Rochelle cared not. In that moment she only cared about the hurt that still resided deep in the bruise and the soothing that he could bring to her frayed nerves.

A couple of large steps bought the Cardassian deep into the living area of her new quarters, he'd begun holding himself slightly larger as of late, rather than the hunched creature who tried to hide at times, most people now found the full 6 foot 1 of the engineer, he turned and caught the glimpse of Rochelle, moving towards her with a smile that began to fade as he saw the state of her eye.

The little Captain turned from the mirror when she heard the familiar sound of the Engineer's foot falls steadily approaching. Her hands folded in front of her, silent and allowing her fingers to wring together. There was nothing to say, no beginning of a sentence that would cushion the impact of what happened. There wasn't anything you could do to prevent this. She wanted to say, but instead found herself standing in silence as he continued to approach.

"I don't suppose you could pirate a dermal regenerator." She finally asked, watching him and the smile drain from his features. Something had changed in him, his steps and motions now held an amazing amount of power when once they seemed so small and shallow. Almar had blossomed into something truly magnificent. She couldn't help but notice and admire the man that slowly and surely was becoming what she'd known he could be all along.

"What in blazes happened to you?" the Cardassian asked as he moved to her and lifted a hand, gently brushing the cheek under the bruising, careful to avoid any contact that might be painful to her, "I'm sure I can pick one up from the supplies,"

She shrugged gently, the big fluff of her robe rising and falling with her little frame as she did. "It's a long story that ends with me not wanting to create more drama by going to sick bay." Her reply was punctuated by a small, hesitant little laugh as she submitted to his touch. "You were the only person I wanted to see after everything." Rochelle's own fingers touched the soft underside of his wrist just below the heel of his palm, carefully applying pressure to guide his touch away from tender skin that hadn't yet succumbed to the bruising.

"I can understand the need for creating as little drama as possible," Almar replied as he allowed her to guide his hand, brushing past a strand of hair that he flicked behind her ear.

"What hit you? a Gorn?" he asked as his hand dropped away from her face and a small smile returned to his, his head tilting to the side slightly as he regarded her.

Nodding, Rochelle was truly relieved by his understanding of her need for privacy in most personal matters. She'd never been a flamboyant creature, never liked the limelight -- and now she'd been thrust into it doubly in some bizarre dog and pony show she couldn't quite get used to. Being a Captain came naturally, it was in her blood and she'd been carefully reared and groomed for the role from childhood. Queen, however, was certainly not her forte.

"Atlantean." She replied simply, finding herself tilting her own head to watch him watch her.

"Whatever it was, certainly left its mark," the Cardassian replied with a light chuckle as he took one of her hands in his and locked his fingers with hers.

"More than you know." She sighed, pressing her palm to his much larger one, all too happy to accept his presence. "Once upon a time ago there was a young executive officer who thought she was in love with an Atlantean security chief." She began, dropping her gaze to study their entwined fingers and tugged gently, taking a step backwards and imploring him to follow. "Little did she know that they'd become bonded and he was the crowned prince of his world. They married, more because he wanted it and she felt it was the natural process of things all things considered, only to divorce a short time later, very short." The corner of her mouth turned up in a sardonic little smile as she continued to lead him towards her vanity, deciding not to hide from him. "Atlanteans, however, don't believe in divorce and since the little XO didn't take another lover in that time, which would have broken the bond, when the Queen died and there were no further women in their line and the little XO," She paused and sighed, releasing his hand only to tug the top drawer open, "Ok... So the XO is now a CO, but the point remains that in their matriarchal society, even though she was human she was suddenly crowned Queen of that empire." Rochelle's nose wrinkled slightly as she fished the gleaming tiara out, holding it in her palms to show the Cardassian. "And that is why she now has a black eye, because the porter is a barbarian who doesn't appreciate her being Queen anymore than she does."

"Interesting, a Queen and a Commanding Officer in Starfleet, that puts you in quite a unique position constitutionally, normally monarchs are restricted from entering the service." Almar replied as he took the tiara gently and ran his scaled fingers along it, feeling the workmanship that had gone into it, "Have you informed Malone?"

"No." She responded honestly, "I was an officer and a Captain before I was a Queen and to me... I didn't want this and frankly I'm not going to resign my commission because of it." Rochelle's arms folded over her chest the moment he took the tiara from her, tugging the robe tight against as if it were a security blanket against the crown itself.

"What are the rules surrounding abdication?" the Cardassian asked as he handed the tiara back to her and moved to sit down on the nearest surface.

Taking the tiara back was filled with anxiety, she unfolded to do so with hesitation and sat it back in her vanity drawer. "There isn't an option. Starfleet allowed William Taggart to serve even though he was the crowned prince. Admiral Blyx Red is a crowned regent as well. There are exceptions to the rules." She replied, moving to stand in front of where he sat.

"I meant in the Atlantean civilization, surely there is some method of abdication for a monarch who doesn't wish it, or is the only way to give up the throne through death?" the Cardassian asked as he looked up into her eyes.

"I..." She shook her head, her eyes finding the floor for a moment, "I believe it's death. They're such a strange race." It was hard for her to even reply, to say such a thing. Death to her seemed so close, constantly courting and begging for her to join them -- but so far away as she struggled to maintain her life and step away from that vicious ledge she'd tight rope walked for so long. She didn't want to die, and if that meant keeping a title and a crown, she'd do it. Looking back up, she caught his gaze and her hand reached to cup his cheek, her thumb soothing the skin beneath.

"Well, for the moment, Starfleet have much more important things to think about than someone ruling a planet and serving as a Commanding Officer," Almar replied as he reached up and placed his hand over hers, "For now, you have more important things to think about."

"I do." She responded with a nod, a small smile slowly making its way over the delicate nature of her face, stealing the thunder away from the black eye that marred the picture. Rochelle knew his words, as always, held double meaning. She had them to think about, whether to clip their wings or to allow them to fly, and the coming departure of the Vindicator to Qo'noS.

To let them fly brought with it the warm zip of electricity from her chest down to her core, the promise of something greater that she knew he'd handle with care and devotion. But it also brought with it the anxiety and fear of loss and pain to come should the cards come calling. It frightened her, that feeling of utter despair when faced with such a decision. Leaning forward she allowed her lips to press just below the indent on his forehead, working to soothe and settle the both of them.

The kiss sent a shock down the spine of the normally cold blooded Cardassian, he instinctively found himself burying his face into her neck, her scent filling his lungs and breathing new life into him. Each of the kisses he laid we're soft and gentle as his arms clasped around her narrow waist.

He wanted to fly.

She could feel it in the way he touched and held her, demanding that she let him in and drop the walls she'd thrown up. It seemed so easy, so simple to just give in, the quivering need from somewhere deep within begging for her to do so. Rochelle gasped under the touch of his lips as they found her pulse and his arms held her tight, threatening to tear away her resolve. To leap was to risk him, to risk him was to potentially break was was left of her heart.

Something had taken Almar and he found himself kissing up the delicate length of her neck and along the line of her jaw. He'd only been in this position a couple of times before and never with a superior officer, and while his mind screamed for restraint - he still found himself pushing forward, forging a path through the walls that she struggled to maintain.

"Almar..." The Captain's breath came quick, his name more of a whimper than anything as she struggled against the sensations that slowly began to drag her down, bringing her to perch on the Cardassian's lap with her head thrown to the side to better accommodate each electrifying kiss. Her fingers, trembling, managed to find his jaw, gently guiding his mouth from her skin, granting her salvation from such exquisite temptation as she managed to come free, to win... For now. "It's too soon. I can't do this to you." She whispered, holding him, cupping his chin in her tiny hands as she searched his face and eyes.

The Cardassian's blood cooled as she spoke his name, her hands burnt against his skin and made him tremble. His eyes found hers and a slight smile crossed his face, he was glad that one of them stopped it before something had happened they may regret. Almar burnt for her and his heart ached, but he understood the meaning behind her words. His hands left her back and moved to run through her hair gently, "I know," he replied softly as he cradled her in his arms.

Her pink tongue peeked out and ran across her lips as she tried her damnedest to slow her wildly beating heart. He was beautiful, serene even in his undying intensity. It begged for him, her heart did, pleading with her to keep him close and never let him go and still she continued to deny it so close to Landon's death. It simply couldn't be. Wouldn't be. "Thank you." Rochelle murmured, her eyes half closing as his fingers tussled through her hair and came to rest around her, holding her, protecting her, loving her. He knew. That was all she could ask for.

He held her, close enough so that he could feel the beat of her heart echoing his own. The intimacy of their situation held their hearts at a higher pace and Almar couldn't pull away, his forehead tilted forward and connected with hers gently.

To her he was salvation and damnation all rolled into one exquisite creation, continuously forcing her to shift gears as he encouraged her onward down the path of life. He wouldn't let her die, not any part of her. Not her soul, not her heart, not the fire that burned or the ice that froze -- each intricate part of her was carefully cultivated by his otherworldly gentleness and grace. She knew he'd wait for her, persistently keeping close and never allowing her to forget him, but never forcing her hand like so many others would.

They sat that way for awhile, allowing their hearts to slow and the adrenaline to filter back through their systems, each one hesitant to move from the intricate safety net they'd created. It seemed like hours later when she slipped from his arms to ice her eye and he conquered the task of retrieving a dermal regenerator and set about using it to destroy the worst of the bruise and swelling Mikkal's blow had left in its wake. Life would continue, ever evolving, ever shifting around the two of them as they sought higher ground from the flood that had been created in the wake of tragedy and despair.

(To be continued...)

---

Captain Rochelle Ivanova
Commanding Officer
USS VINDICATOR

&

Commander Almar Dahe'el
Chief Engineering Officer
USS Vindicator

 

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